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To error is human, to forgive is divine, to keep your damn mouth shut is much appreciated.
Imagine being the sort of person who knows what every button on a TV remote does.
I wonder if more children were conceived because of alcohol or more alcohol was consumed because of children.
Dancing in the 70`s: I have absolutely no idea what I am pointing at
Facebook is my serious account, the funny one is my bank account.
If kids get money for losing teeth, what do I get for all this hair I’m losing?
I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
I got this weird condition where I drink a case of beer and fall down.
I wonder if they let me grow cannabis on Farmville, I`ll be able to sell it on Mafia Wars?
My bank called because they noticed ‘highly suspicious activity’ on my charge account. It was for a gym membership.
How does anything EVER get done at the bubble wrap factory??
I go from "Hard to get" to "Hard to get rid of" in 6 beers flat.
I know u r but what am I ?
Feeling pretty good about myself today so I`m going to go meet up with an ex-girlfriend to bring me back down to normal
Ummm,, Can we just admit we may have taken this anybody can grow up to be President thing a bit too far.