Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it than how bad of a decision can it really be?
When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
I see you`re busy. I`ll come back later and ruin your free time.
You should never lie through your teeth. Open your mouth and speak properly.
Not all country music is terrible. If you can get past the lyrics about trucks, mud, farms and cows... It`s actually not too bad.
Hurricanes, Fires,Tiger running loose ... Whoever is playing Jumanji needs to wrap it up
Threw my back out today reaching for the shampoo in the shower. But I`ll be telling everyone it`s from having sex while skydiving.
I`d like to thank Tetris for making me really good at loading my dishwasher.
I`m out like a fat kid playing dodge ball..
Ya know what I really hate about mornings? People start talking to me!
If you can read this, you`re not having sex either.
Do you have neighbors?.. Do you have extension cords?..... Are you paying too much for electricity?
I wonder how the Never-ending story is doing.
The 4 stages of a relationship: 1. I like you 2. I love you 3. I hate you 4. Arson
I bet guys that work at strip clubs are "hard" workers...