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Sometimes knowing exactly where you are does not make you any less lost.
Please either stop being so attractive or make out with me, it`s your choice.
Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth
It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do!
Shout out to metaphors. Without you there would only be like four songs.
How many facebook friends do you have that if they posted "I`m depressed and on the edge", your first thought would be to poke them?
Only in America: We have a holiday devoted to gratitude & then less than 12 hrs later beat the sh!t out of each other for a $10 crockpot.
Where do I see myself in 5 years? May 2019. Next question.
Men are like lottery tickets. Very exciting at first, until you scratch away the surface to reveal the loser beneath.
I sent that "Ancestry " site some information on my family tree. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested that I just start over
When one door closes, another opens ... I had a Chevette that was like that.
When I`m at the mall, I carry a purse around so people think I have a girlfriend.
Well, it`s almost the end of the year. No point in trying to become a good person this late in the game.
All who post weather maps on FB. You know we have the internet too, right??
Walmart...because going to Target requires identity theft protection and a shower.