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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I`m still mad that video killed the radio star.
According to a recent survey, 98% of people responded with `Go away.`
I hear my ex is now into orgies, or at least that`s what the Craigslist ad I just posted on her behalf said.
I keep trying to avoid trouble but I think it likes me.
Rubix cubes are EASY....when you`re color blind.
I’m tired of things costing money.
I bought a Tempurpedic mattress just so that I’d have an excuse to go to sleep with a giant glass of wine every night.
I don`t know why people say "your guess is as good as mine"? ..because my guesses are always better. ;)
Just think of how different the world would be if Noah had eaten those two chickens.
I don`t post a lot of personal statuses - but when I do it`s all about you ..
Is food porn star a thing yet??
I really don`t get Astrology but I just hope my daughter stays a Virgo until she`s at least 18.
Relationship status: Just kissed my cat and he got up and moved to the other end of the couch.
I can think of other ways to eat fresh, but I`ll settle for this subway sandwich.
I always put a little umbrella in my drink so it doesn`t dilute in the shower.