Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Wine: How classy people get trashed.
If we all winked, laughed out loud, stuck out our tongues and blew kisses in real life as much as we do in texts...it would be very creepy.
Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will only be jingling "part" of the way this year, as usual ur patience is appreciated.
Bitches be trippin..... ok, maybe I pushed that one.
You can look at some people and instantly know they’re only going to get two awards in life, a birth and a death certificate.
Can Walmart be a feeling? I think that`s how I feel today.
Pretty proud of myself, I got a lot of procrastinating done today
oh look at the time, it`s time to not care
I`m going to propose with a mood ring so I can easily see a measurement of how excited she really is.
People who don’t like pizza are people you don’t need in your life.
*Spoiler Alert*--- Siamese cats are just one cat ... not two cats in one.
I`m sorry, I`ll be busy this weekend walking around my house with mini alcohol bottles and fun size candy bars pretending I`m a giant.
I never run with scissors. (those last two words were unnecessary.)
Note to future self: Tequila is a liar. You do not sound exactly like Axl Rose & the people at karaoke will not catch you if you stage dive
If only there was a way to voice a highly uneducated opinion to thousands of people on a regular basis