Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Bathroom hand dryers are amazing if you want to kill a few minutes before wiping your hands on your pants.
When I want your opinion, I’ll give it a funny voice.
That moment you realize that the person who proofread Hitler`s speeches was indeed a Grammar Nazi.
My favorite thing about marriage is sharing a house with the person most likely to murder me.
They say women only use 10% of their anger
This week is the 40th anniversary of the Rubik`s Cube. If you kids don`t know what a Rubik`s Cube is, it`s what people would stare at without human interaction before cellphones. Mel
How long have I been working here? ... Ever since they threatened to fire me.
I once dated a girl with a parrot. The thing was crazy and never shut up! The parrot was cool though.
Why is it called tourist season if we can`t shoot them?
I guess not everyone at this grocery store is as comfortable with my nudity as I am. ;)
My doctor wrote me a prescription for dailysex but my girlfriend insists it says dyslexia.
Mary had a little lamb,,the midwife fainted
Sometimes I think my job is actually a hidden-camera game show where they see how much absurd bullshit I’ll put up with before I catch on.
If it`s the thought that counts ... Then I should probably be in jail
Wife really liked the "sex anytime, anywhere" coupon I gave her. Probably should have specified "with me"