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Ever notice how the automatic flush sensors in public restrooms kinda look like hidden cameras?
I hate when I get to work and I`m at work.
Boys are like roses, watch out for the pr!cks...
Iron Man is a superhero. Iron woman is a command.
I don`t know why people say life is short....this seems to be taking forever.
I don`t live paycheck to paycheck. I live paycheck to four days before paycheck...
Guys I can`t be leave I`m sharing this with you, but I saw my self on TV. After I turned it off.
My New Years resolution is to stop procrastinating so much.
My mom likes playing this game called `yell from four rooms away and get upset when I can`t hear her`.
Have you tried complaining about it for hours?
I`m 84% less productive in a swivel chair.
I just had a threesome in the shower with Johnson and Johnson.
I started drinking a little early. Yesterday, to be more precise.
It should be a rule that if you dress up like a red hair clown , you get a free happy meal at McDonalds .....I`ll pay this time , but I`m not happy ... !!
If you enjoy being the 10,000th person to put your thumb into a hole, then bowling is for you.