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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Have you ever tried blind-folded archery? You don`t know what you`re missing.
It may look like I’m in deep thought, but 99% of the time I’m just thinking about what food I’m going to eat later.
Everybody stop what you`re doing and play with crayons!! Enjoy the day
If it hurts when you pee, urine trouble.
I beat my chess opponent in less than five moves with the chair I was sitting on!
I replaced the spare tire in my car with a box of wine. I`ve no idea how to change a tire, & I bet I`ll need a drink as I wait for a ride.
If no one comes from the future to stop you, than how bad of a decision can it really be.
Relationship status: I make my own sandwiches.
I broke my finger today. But on the other hand I`m fine.
You can always count on me to feel you up when you`re feeling down
I just want to be rich enough to be referred to as eccentric instead of crazy.
I`m not getting married till Pizza Hut allows gift registry.
I was always a believer in evolution....then I spent an hour at Walmart and now I`m not so sure
I just realized we cook bacon and bake cookies, get it together English.
My motto for the night ... drink till I no longer think :)