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Cauliflower is just broccoli ghosts.
I may have just inadvertently accomplished something
Sometimes you can just tell it`s going to be a "Does not play well with others" kind of day.
Social experiments where skinny people wear fat suits teach us to be nicer to fat people because it might be a skinny person in a fat suit.
Long time ago I used to be young and handsome.. Today? Just handsome
It`s bad luck to be superstitious.
If someone says "I`m a sub-par golfer" does that mean they`re good at golf, or bad?
Life is fun! You should get one.
"With a stroke of a pen your name can live on forever in a quote!... Unknown,
Facebook is like my fridge… I know there is nothing there but I check it every 10 minutes anyways.
Auto correct changed "group hug" to "grope hug" and I`m not in charge of the team-building exercises any more.
I live like I type, fast and with lots of mistakes!
It´s never to late to be happy
I`m Dave, or as the ladies like to call me... "Hey, you! Behind the bushes!"
Sorry, I didn’t mean to text you a graphic description of my explosive diarrhea. Stupid autocorrect.