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Ran out of post-it notes, now I don`t know how to remind myself to buy more.
I inboxed a girl on Facebook and she never replied. I guess you could say we`re `seen` each other.
I thought about going outside and doing something today but my Wi-Fi really doesn`t reach very far.
Jealously is something you’re good at when you suck at everything else.
They say swearing is due to limited vocabulary. I know thousands of words, but I still prefer`f*ck off` to `go away`.
I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the internet.
Damn you auto correct mind your business.
I`ve never done any mistake twice... three, four times may be!
I spend hours on Facebook and then think, “Well, that was pointless”
The pollen is so bad this year that the trailer park people are changing crystal meth back into Sudafed.
I saw a man at the beach screaming, "Help, shark, help!" I laughed because I knew the shark wasn`t going to help him.
Santa gets all the credit and I get all the debt.
I really like what you`ve done with your crazy.
Taking a nap is always so risky like when will I wake up -- In 30 minutes? In 3 hours? In 9 years? No one can ever be sure.
Woke up screaming this morning. My apologies to everyone in the meeting.