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Relatives - Because sometimes you need reminding of your bad genes too.
Netflix should double as a dating site and be like "here are 9 other singles in your area that watched LOST for the past 11 hours."
Statistics say that 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea. Does that mean that 1 enjoys it?
Thinking about moving to Alabama just so I don’t have to scroll through all those other states when I sign up for websites.
This status is mine....I licked it.
Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and your first reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor?
yelling at the referee that he made a mistake has never worked, No Referee has never turned around and said, "Why yes your are right silly me I did make a mistake, penalty denied, goal kick"
Forgets to set alarm, wakes up 3 days later.
Confucius would have been great at Status Updates......
I don’t call it laying down anymore, I call it landscape mode.
Sometimes, I`m offended at how easily offended some people get.
I want to tell my coworker I have strong feelings for her, but I`m afraid things might get weird if she knows I hate her.
C`mon Netflix, we both know I`m watching the next episode. Just go ahead and start it.
If Reincarnation ends up being real... Those People who got "YOLO" tattoos are going to look... Pretty Silly
Procrastination: when "make a bucket list" is on your bucket list.