Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Looks like Waldo got on the malasian plane.. well played waldo.. well played..
I think my front door faces the wrong direction. People keep finding it.
That`s like asking the fat guy to watch the pie.
Starting tomorrow, whatever life throws at me, I`m ducking so it hits someone else!
Googling ways to dispose of a body, mostly to freak out the douche behind me who keeps staring at my laptop screen
you know why maths is unhappy? because it got so many problems.
Imagine how fun Pringles would be if the cans were spring-loaded.
You should always love a woman for her personality. We have so many to choose from.
That awkward moment when you finally realize what your rice krispies are saying to you.
I wish I could have the Price Is Right audience around whenever I`m making important life decisions.
Career goal: Being successful enough to add bacon to my burger without asking how much more it costs.
You`ll all be sorry when I figure out how to breathe fire.
Reverse cowgirl. Perfect for when you`re horny, but can`t stand to look at each other !
Congratulation! You`ve won a lifetime supply of air! Not valid under water, in space, when dead, or while choking.
Kid`s Choice Awards are a great reminder why children aren`t allowed to vote.