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I tend to say “I don’t know” when I’m too lazy to think.
Is it just me, or do mirrors look really sexy?
This skinny girl just told me she "forgets" to eat? Is that possible? I just licked her face in case it`s contagious.
Shopping at the Dollar Tree makes me feel rich and poor at the same time
Without stupid people we would have no one to laugh at.
Where there`s a will I want to be in it
It`s the little things in life that matter the most... for instance the refrigerator light, helping you to see that last beer way in the back!
Nothing says you are ugly like Facebook asking ``Are you sure you want to make this your profile picture?``
Today is national bring your flask to work day. I just made it up. Tell the others...
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
Never ask a Leper to "give you a hand", seriously, don`t........................
The guy who wrote the program that estimates how much time is left on a download did not take his job seriously at all.
I was always a believer in evolution....then I spent an hour at Walmart and now I`m not so sure
They said money can`t by happiness. But it can buy tattoos, car parts, and beer. What else could we need?
People say that I have no idea what hard work is. That`s not true! I know exactly what it is... How do you think I avoid it so easily?