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Apparently it was a bad idea to ask Siri, "What do women want?" She`s been talking for the last 2 days and doesn`t seem ready to shut up anytime soon.
"Don`t make me regret this." -things I think when accepting a friend request.
I got a letter from my crush on Valentine`s Day. Well, technically it`s a restraining order but still....
Golf would be a lot more fun to watch on TV if the balls were on fire
I`ll do whatever it takes to be the mistake you can`t live without
I feel like I am losing my mind !!! But as long as I can keep the bit that tells me when to pee, I should be OK !!
TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public.
First you`re telling me to be myself, then you`re telling me to stop being an idiot. Make up your mind!
Wearing my pajamas to Walmart. I don`t want to attract any attention.
gets drunk on one drink. The trouble is, I can´t remember if it´s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
Do you have to water a Pointsettia or do they die on their own?
I don`t run away from my problems. That`s immature. I ignore them.
"No! Don`t leave me! I need you! Nooooo!" I say as my laptop cords slowly slides off my bed onto the floor.
I`ll never join one of those dating sites. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way. By alcohol & bad decisions.
Being an adult is mostly just wondering if the stuff in the dishwasher is dirty or clean while eating soup out of a sand castle bucket.