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From this point on, all postings of pictures of waffles will be considered a personal invitation.
Sorry I’m cranky. I didn’t get my nap in today.
I was on way home this morning when I seen an AA van pulled in and the driver was crying his eyes out. I thought to myself that guy is heading for a breakdown.
What idiot called it Adderall instead of Accomplish Mints?
Are you always this stupid? or are you just making special effort today...
There are 2 types of people in this world, those who press “door close” in the elevator before others can jump on & those who are liars.
Whoever said, "All men are created equal", obviously has never received any d!ck pics
The older I get, the more I sympathize with Squidward`s anger.
I`m sorry if I come across as crude, outspoken, and opinionated. That`s only because I am crude, outspoken, and opinionated.
Some moments you remember all your life. Reading this, unfortunately, is not one of those moments.
i just fell off a 20ft ladder.. good thing I was on the first step.
Everyone please stop doing crimes because sirens are too noisy.
Well it`s almost time for that " New Year -- New Me " bullsh_t again!
When I am working, I get paid to be nice. I don`t understand why my friends and family expect me to do it for free during my time off.
Just spent like 5 hours talking to my neighbor about his garden and long story short, turns out it was just a f*cking scarecrow.