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If every U.S. sports team converted to metric, Americans would understand the metric system by the next game.
Sometimes it`s nice to know karma is still a feisty little b!tch.
Hey ladies, I just love "Austrailian" kissing...it`s a lot like "French" kissing only Down Under!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
I like when google answers my stupid questions because it means I`m not the only one asking google stupid questions.
Whoever invented the 5 day work week and 2 day weekend can suck my a**!
I was blown away when I realised the word " OK " is a side ways person.
The new Jungle Book movie might be confusing to today`s kids who don`t remember when we had jungles. Or books...
If you don’t already hate people, the mall is a great place to start.
Made the decision that I`m done having kids. Yet every morning I wake up and there they are asking me for breakfast.
You mean you can actually put the cork back in a wine bottle? WHY!!??
"Hey bro shotgun this beer" No I don`t drink "You wanna be cool don`t you?" I don`t drink "C`mon NERD!" Grandma PLEASE stop
Learned a lesson from my dog tonight ... No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that sh1t and move on.
"Be yourself" is about the worst advice you can give some people.
Dropped my son off for his first day of kindergarten today. Does anybody know what age you`re supposed to pick them up?