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They call themselves independent women until furniture needs to be moved
One should love animals.. They are so tasty.
No matter how little I do in a day. I always feel like I could have done less.
I love facebook... It`s the only place where I can talk to a wall and not look like an idiot...
I put my head between my legs and lean forward.....thats how I roll
The list of things I won’t eat if covered in chocolate gets smaller everyday.
Me: There has to be a way I can lose weight! Friend: Eat healthy? Exercise? Me: No, that`s not it. Keep thinking! We`ll figure this out.
At the Touch of Love..Everyone Becomes a Poet !
But..At the Touch of Breakup Everyone Becomes a Philosopher... ^_^
Life is hard, it`s even harder when your stupid.
I love sleep because its like a time machine to breakfast.
I have found my sleep number and it is eleven, eleven beers.
What is this World Cup and can I drink from it?
It must suck when billionaires wake up feeling like a million bucks.
If you`re crazy and you know it shake your meds...
Oh... the look on the Home Depot associate`s face when I asked him if the pruning shears will cut through bone... priceless.