Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
When I was young I dreamed of saving the world, now I just dream of making through each month.
I hate those idiots with those bright halogen lights that are blinding, at least they can see my one finger salute.
I`m 28 years old, but in marriage years, I`m dead on the inside.
I make way more decisions than I should based on the battery life of my phone.
Sorry for accidentally karate kicking you. Sorry for high-fiving everyone who saw it.
Why isn`t Hungary`s capital city called "Very"
I believe in karma, which is why I`m such a d!ck to total strangers, just in case they deserve it.
I was in a bar when a girl called me a cheapskate. So I threw her drink in her face.
is it just me, or did anyone else think that we would be living like the Jetson´s by 2011?
I don`t care what the expiration date says, I have to smell it
Dear Boyfriend, Your wallet was getting fat so I thought I’d take it out for some exercise. Sincerely, your Girlfriend.
I think I`m funny - but looks aren`t everything
Pretending I`m a pleasent person all day is exhausting
My credit card company says I have an outstanding balance. I was flattered.
I was in my kitchen cleaning when suddenly I realized OMG! ... I`m late for Facebook!!