Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My superpower is making people laugh ... Which would be great if I was trying to be funny
Sometimes I order Domino`s but give them Pizza Hut`s address. And when they show up and start fighting, I just wait with my mouth open.
Some of the best things in life...are mistakes.
"I can`t wait to nail you later" *whispers to the new picture I just bought*
The trick to falling asleep is putting your phone down. Unfortunately, that`s not a risk I`m willing to take.
I’d be unstoppable if it wasn’t for law enforcement and physics.
You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.
My life is a very complicated drinking game
I`m going to stand outside, so if anyone asks I am outstanding.
A Relationship is like poker, if you don`t have a partner you better have a good hand.
If idiots could fly this place would be an airport.
People born in 1994-1999 have lived in three decades, two centuries, and two millenniums. & they are not even 18 yet.
i just fell off a 20ft ladder.. good thing I was on the first step.
My Wife does this cute thing where she says that "actions speak louder than words" and then gets pissed at me for just nodding.
Based on my reaction to toast popping out of a toaster, I’d like to recommend you never throw me a surprise party.