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never be afraid to wipe twice
That awkward moment when you make a Harry Potter reference and none of your Muggle friends get it.
I`ve been building my own particle accelerator. Plan to create a boson particle. Explore the mysteries.....you know what? This is a lot of work. Think I`m just going to have a beer and play Call of Duty.
the difference between people and celebreties ...... celebreties don`t have a routine
Someone told me I`m immature and need to grow up. Guess who`s not allowed in my treehouse now.
No one is ever bored enough to start studying.
Freak people out in public restrooms by saying “come in” when they knock on the stall door.
Asking a guy, "Are you done with that?" & pointing to his girlfriend, is frowned upon. Apparently.
You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.
The worst thing about rich people is I`m not one of them.
The problem with the world is intelligent people are full of doubts, while stupid people are full of confidence.
I`m never free but I`m available.
Few people have the balls to admit when they`re wrong. Then again, few people have talking balls.
Did you ever wonder why the cat was in the bag in the first place?
I need a new bad decision.