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So I´ve narrowed it down and I´m either gonna start a motorcycle gang or take a nap.
In Store Special - "You`re My One and Only" Valentine`s Day cards... 4 for $5...
I have to admit my heart broke a little when I heard the lady at Starbucks call the guy in line behind me "sweetie" too.
I`m changing my voicemail greeting to: Please hang up and text me, thanks. ;)
I`m glad people are exercising but I want to see cooler activities posted on FB. Like "I spent 1 hour wrestling a bear. 110 calories burned."
If there is one-thing in this would i don`t like being thought is ... a lesson.
I love buying a $1 burger and getting $2 worth of mayo...
If Tetris has taught me anything it`s that errors pile up and accomplishments disappear.
Installing home security cameras seemed like a great idea but explaining my dance offs with the dog was something I should`ve considered.
God knew that there would be times that a single middle finger wouldn`t be enough.
Whenever I tell the cashier to ‘keep the change`, it takes everything in my power not to call them a filthy animal.
According to maxipad commercials, all women are full of blue windshield washer fluid...
How strict is the "I licked it, it`s mine" policy? There`s some things I`ve licked that I don`t want.
I’m positive that somewhere out there exists a video montage of me dancing alone in various elevators.
Hysterical Shrieking should be reserved for truly serious situations such as Centipedes, Spiders, and that Creepy Uncle that likes to give everyone back rubs.....