Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I like to friend friends of friends then unfriend the first friend to freak out the friend of a friend.
I`m 28 years old, but in marriage years, I`m dead on the inside.
I’m what you would call “indoorsy”
Time flies when you’re having a drunken blackout.
Life is so much funnier if you have a dirty mind
So, I hear Colorado`s population has increased 420%.
Relationship status – table for one but drinks for two.
If kids are so wonderful why do you have to pay people to watch them?
*uses Ouija board* NEW PHONE WHO DIS
One of my best talents is pretending to like people. Unfortunately, I only show it when no one`s around.
Quick question, ladies: If you shave your eyebrows off and then draw them back on, what the hell are you doing?
I will never miss you, because I`m a really good shooter.
My favorite sex position is, "don`t tell anyone we did this".
The real heroes are the people who live within driving distance of their in-laws.
I can`t believe these women are just walking around with yoga mats like a game of yoga might just break out at any moment