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I wonder if angry people know about naps?
If I had a dollar for every girl that told me I was unattractive, they’d eventually find me attractive.
If sex is said to be the best exercise, than why are there no fitness clubs for that. Now there`s idea. . .
I`m pretty sure the whole "ladies first" thing was created by a guy just to check out a$$.
is having one of those days where they feels like lighting someones face on fire and then trying to put it out with a fork
Whoever said "nothing is impossible" never tried to nail JELL-O to a tree.
In a new study women with large a$$es live longer………the men who tell them live distinctively shorter lives.
Why do people always feel safe under blankets...its not like a murderer will break in and be like "I`M GONNA KILL YAA__AAHHHhhhh dang he is under a blanket.
The key to a long relationship: Keep the fights clean and the sex dirty.
If you`re not afraid when someone is flipping through the photos on your phone then you`re probably boring.
Lazy Rule #23 :No Shower Is Needed, If your Not Going Anywhere...
Remind me why I work 40 hours a week to be this poor?
I`m a big advocate of the `You started it` method of defense in an argument.
If I was antisocial I wouldn`t have just ordered a pizza over the phone.
I threw a shotgun shell at my daughter`s date. ..then I told him it`s much faster after 11pm