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Insomnia is very common. Try not to lose any sleep over it.
I hate it when people beg for likes, like if you agree?
Its so cold outside I just saw a teenager with his pants pulled all the way UP
It`s a little disappointing when you`re watching a school basket ball game & no one turns into a werewolf.
A Girl Scout made headlines when she sold cookies outside a Colorado pot shop. There’s no word on how she plans to spend her first million.
Often I convince myself I enjoy the company of other humans. Then I spend time with them and remember I don`t.
Life gets expensive when you trust a cute woman.
Save time. See it my way.
Look Bruce, just because you call it the "Batcave" doesn`t change the fact that you still live in your parents basement.
Fast way to mess up someones Knock Knock joke? "It`s open."
Some old people are driving vehicles right now and don’t even know it.
Sometimes I want to comment on a photo on Facebook but then I don’t wanna have to explain why I’m in your ‘Random Party Pics 08' album at 4am.
Don`t get into a relationship with someone unless they love you as much as Kim Kardashian loves Kim Kardashian.
You know what the trouble about real life is? There`s no danger music.
What did I get for Christmas? Fat...