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The Wizard of Oz is really just a cautionary tale about the lengths a woman will go to for the right shoes.
The Shining is my favorite movie about what can happen when you spend too much time with family.
A Girl Scout made headlines when she sold cookies outside a Colorado pot shop. There’s no word on how she plans to spend her first million.
I am tired of men complaining about women complaining about men complaining about women
If you don`t pay your exorcist do you get repossessed?
List of things I’ve accomplished today: 1. Accomplishments List
"Grapey." -me after every wine at the wine-tasting
I got pulled over for drunk driving last night. In my defense I didn’t even know I was driving.
I took a pic of my self a few days ago. Now I`m playing with it. Yeah...I`m playing with my selfie.
I can`t believe we made a movie that is essentially giving the apes a blueprint on how to take over the Earth.
I have decided to stop exercising and just learn Photoshop.
The biggest cause of cancer in mice is research.
Walmart needs observation decks.
I`m sorry. Putting up with your sh!t isn`t on my To-Do list today.
I wonder what the inventor of the drawing board said when his first design didn’t work out.