Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My inner child is a drunken whore
Just in case you are wondering ... I did not go to Jared.
Girls are funny creatures. They hate it when you ask their age but will kill you if you forget their birthday.
Give a man a gun he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob everybody
If I`ve learned anything from Facebook, it`s that you shouldn`t be learning on Facebook.
I put the "fun" in "functioning alcoholic"
Some days your the duck. Some days your the goose.
Glad McDonald`s don`t serve hotdogs, I don`t think I could order a McWeiner with a straight face.
You know that tingly feeling you get when you have a crush on someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.
Rick Ross be rapping about cars he can`t even fit in.
If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
You mean to tell me people run? On purpose? When nobody is chasing them?
I would know if I was insane, the voices would tell me.
My goal today is to turn actions into thoughts.
In the word "scent" is it the s that is silent or the c?