Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sometimes all you need is $500 million dollars.
Yawning is our body`s way of saying 20% of battery remaining
Maybe cologne should come with a two sprays a day lock on it.
Not sure if my dog is barking for no reason or I’m about to be murdered.
Reverse Psychology: DO not STALK MY FB PAGE. YOU ARE not OBSESSED WITH ME...
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you’ve had?
A high school diploma takes you 12 years to get, 2 minutes to frame and a lifetime to forget where you put it.
Never trust a married guys opinion of who’s hot. It’s like asking a starving guy what food tastes good.
I just keep telling myself you guys don`t have sex either.
Talk to your kids about drugs. Maybe they have better connections than you.
I`d stop disappointing you, if you stopped expecting me to do stuff.
Irony. The opposite of wrinkly.
Neil Armstrong was the first human being to step foot on the moon. Neil A. backwards spells "Alien"
It`s no fun if you have permission.