Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The only time I want to hear about your baby is when you tell me it ain`t mine.
I love my toilet. We`ve been through alot of sh!t together.
If you ever feel unattractive, just remember that you look like your ancestors and all of them got laid.
Thinking of getting another kitchen table just for all my mail
According to these court documents, the way to a woman`s heart isn`t through her bedroom window.
Are headaches the result of time spent with woman or is it purely a coincidence?
One day you will meet someone so amazing in every way who will want absolutely nothing to do with you.
Hey ladies breastfeeding in public,…Why don’t you ever smile in my pictures?
You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn`t come back, what you`ve lost is a normal pigeon.
The corner of my bathtub is also referred to as "The Shampoo Bottle Graveyard"
Being unsure has never stopped me from making a decision.
Tell a therapist, Not Facebook.
Hey, car designers, you have kids, right? How is "limo window partition" between the front and back seat not an option yet?
1. Pour milk on floor. 2. Ask which kid did it. 3. Send them to their rooms when they don`t admit it. 4. Enjoy peaceful evening.
They say love is in every corner… Then my life must be a freakin’ circle.