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“Swearing is unattractive” I’m not attractive anyway so f*ck off
If it`s true that we are here on earth to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
You guys are even more beautiful now that I`m wearing my "wine glasses".
I saw a chameleon today. I guess it was a pretty crappy chameleon.
Guys, if my hair doesn`t look like a birds nest afterward, you`re doing it wrong.
I have a life outside of internet, it involves charging my phone.
What if Deja Vu meant you lost a life and you are starting back off at your last checkpoint.
Single ? I`m not single, I`m in a long standin relationship with fun and freedom ! ;)
Oh cool! ... I really do not care.
If your single and you know it…Pet your cat!
Everyday I run into someone who pushes me past the limits of my medication.
According to Pinterest, I`m severely under-utilizing mason jars.
This ramen noodle and vienna sausage dinner taste exactly like I made the wrong career choice :(
I think I`m going to run for political office, so people can dig up dirt on me. I have been wanting to piece together my twenties.
is at the park. Unless you’re my boss, in which case, I’m at work.