Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
When you wish upon a shooting star, all your dreams will come true. Unless the star is really a meteor about to destroy the earth. Then, you´re pretty much dead no matter what you wish for.
I was disappointed to learn that the Discovery Channel’s program “Deadliest Catch” wasn’t about first marriages.
So no pizza place on Ninja Turtles ever questioned the delivery address being “The Sewer”
I wish my personality allowed me to write deep and meaningful statuses sometimes, oh well. Titties!
Our phone falls, we panic... our friends fall, we laugh.
Oh I thought it was wait 30 YEARS after eating before you exercise.
When you’re old, my kids will be in charge. I’m so, so sorry.
stupidity is a privelege entitled to everyone but you my dear are abusing this right
Weird that we don`t see more pants on fire
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place to have sex.
Nothing says lazy like laying on the couch making today`s responsibilities tomorrow`s problem.
The only reason any of us can spell laboratory is because of Dexter.
Great friends never let you do stupid things......alone
If the cupcake has some green sprinkles on it, it`s a vegetable, right?
I think stupid people were put on this earth to test my anger management skills.