Daily Silly Status

I`ve ended up encountering much less porridge than I had expected I would as a child.

I wonder if the Happy Birthday wishes I send out to my Facebook friends would mean the same to them if they knew that I was sitting on the toilet.... LOL

"Who`s this clown?" - every guy about every other guy who is in a photo with a girl we like

Thank God I still have 20 days to achieve my goal of "going to the gym in 2013."

Any time someone says "have you seen that YouTube video?" I always say yes......... Because otherwise they make you watch it on their phone

Today I met one of those people on the bus that gets all pissed off when you put your finger in their mouth when they yawn.

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she`s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

Win every argument simply by repeating your opponent`s last sentence in a whiny voice.

I bet all the cool math nerds call each other algebros.

Maybe this comment wont be important for you guys here. Some of you will ignore it, most of yall wont bother to read and it`ll go unnoticed along with some others. maybe I`ll be criticized for this but I just want to let yall know I`m selling potatoes

Someone tore off my warning label when I was born.

Depending on the boob, the Bra is either the best or worst invention ever.

I wish tanning beds could pop you out like a toaster when you`re finished.

Sharks aren’t so bad. If some stranger entered my house wearing only a Speedo, I would probably attack him too.

All I want is a little more than I’ll ever get.