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It only takes a few seconds to show someone how you feel about them......the police call it indecent exposure but whatever.
It was love at first sight...I should have looked twice.
Sleeping alone is a complete waste of my sexual talent.....
I`m as nutty as a squirell fart
It`s crazy that your brain can calculate where to put your hand to catch a 98 mph fastball... But won`t keep your mouth shut when a woman is angry
I have a land line just so that I still have the option to slam the phone down when I angrily hang up on someone.
I just ordered a Life Alert bracelet so if I ever get a life I`ll be notified immediately.
I`m pretty sure apple kid below needs help..
Good to know that if they ever release a lion in Walmart you only have to run faster than the fat lady with the zebra print pants on.
It`s fun to leave a note on the windshield of an expensive car saying sorry I smashed it, but I fixed it so well that you can`t tell.
If you are going to call the cops every time you spot me in your bushes I don`t think this relationship is going to work.
lifes a laugh, start living it!
Fact: if you give your boyfriend a bj each time you act crazy, he`ll not only forgive you,but eventually be thrilled when you act nuts.
There is 2 address we will always know by heart, 1: Our Own, and 2: P. Sherman 42 wallyby way Sydney!
I wish college was 5 easy payments of $19.99