Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
There`s a difference between having a unique name and a common name that`s spelled wrong.
My top 5 exercises: -Jumping to conclusions -Flying off the handle -Carrying things too far -Dodging responsibilities -Pushing my luck
A dog running a hundred miles to retrieve a stick? That`s pretty far-fetched.
The United States is probably the only country in the world where people need energy drinks to sit in front of a computer all day.
CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE: Oh... I have nothing to say, I just crave the spotlight.
Currently in the planning stages for a hangover.
I`m honestly convinced some women do not fart. They just hold it in, and it comes out as drama.
Girls are like parking spots all the good ones are taken and the rest are to far away
I`m tired of people assuming I`ve got a good personality because I`m ugly.
Boobs are like the Sun. You can stare at them directly just for a few seconds, but if you put on sunglasses, you can stare as much as you want!
gave up trying to understand women years ago. Women understand women and they hate each other.
It doesn`t matter if you don`t like my personality... I have several more!
OMG this is Freaky! Have 8 beers & 3 shots, go to your phone the next day, press ‘Recently Dialed’ & the name of your crush will appear!
Imagine if someone`s name was Gurt. You`d be all "yo gurt!" .. funny? no? Ok (._.)
Even if gas prices go down, I´m still going to siphon gas from my neighbor´s car because I like the adrenaline rush and he´s an a$$hole