Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you raise your children, you spoil your grandkids. If you spoil your children, you raise your grandkids.
The only correct answer to "Are you ticklish?" is "I have explosive diarrhea right now,"
Test drove a Jaguar today. Very fast but the ride was pretty bumpy and the saddle kept falling off. I also think he tried to bite me.
No great story started with someone drinking water.
It might look like I`m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I`m quite busy.
She was rare, like an onion ring in french fries
YouTube "This video is not available in your country". where the hell am I from? NARNIA?
I think we`ll be friends forever because we`re too lazy to find new friends.
Well, all I have to say is TGIF. (Post this on any day but Friday to get comments)
The lady next to me in the elevator told me to press One. That was the last thing I remembered
I don`t need WebMD to tell me what`s wrong with me, I have my mother.
Orgasms are alot like pizza. As long as I have pizza I don`t really care if you don`t have any pizza.
Being an adult is mostly pretending to like wine and saying "the economy" a lot.
My dance moves are somewhere between “dog being shocked by an electric fence” and “squirrel crossing the road.”
So I danced like no one was watching. My court date is pending.