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I hear Internet Explorer 10 is going to allow you to download and install Firefox up to three times faster.
All sex is safe sex if you keep your bright orange reflective vest on.
Why is it that everyone you hate has such a better job than you?
Why doesn’t The Rock just tell us what he’s cooking? I can’t pair wines like this.
I’m at the doctor’s office & they don’t know why I have this rash on my balls. Guess I’ll wait for the Dr, these other patients are clueless.
I can’t wait to be ashamed of what I do this weekend.
Whether you`re a woman or a straight man, taking a bra off is likely to be one of the high points of your day.
Someone’s going to ruin things; it might as well be me.
three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere "Hold my purse."
WikiHow suggested 9 Ways to Celebrate Earth Day.... I did all by ?#? SLEEPING?the whole day! How???? I smoked less, used water/power less etc. Wikiwikiwiki!!!!!
I admit ive been known to wrap bacon in bacon just for the extra bacon flavor
Thanks to my mom, I put my name on all of my underwear so they`re easier to spot when I go through the bar`s lost and found box.
I just found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in my mom’s bedroom. I can’t believe it.. She’s a superhero!
Your girlfriend is rated E... For Everyone
Life is basically just a constant effort to not be disgusting.