Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If the interviewer asks where you see yourself in 5 years. Standing naked on top of a fire truck does not appear to be the correct answer
Just once I would like to read a warning label that says "May cause permanent weight loss, remove wrinkles, and increase energy."
Happiness, is just a liquor store away.
I need a vacation ... or this fifth of Jack -Me at the liqiour store
I don`t know if I should tip the bathroom attendant, or charge for letting him watch...
Making mirrors look good, since 1972
Nascar would be so more entertaining if they threw banana peels and turtle shells.
Time to be an adult and give up my bath time rubber ducky. I´m upgrading to the tugboat!
Experience is what you get, when you don`t get what you want
People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who really do.
I like to go to a strangers house tell them you used to live there and that your grandfather hid money somewhere in the house and just leave.
Drunk me absolutely loves creating awkward encounters for sober me.
If you start smacking people with your wife`s purse she won`t ask you to hold it for her anymore
A synonym is a word you use when you can´t spell the word you first thought of.
The true trollers are the ones who troll the trolls.