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Don`t do anything you`re not prepared to explain to a paramedic...
President Obama says his daughters need minimum wage jobs to "learn what it means to work." May I suggest the same for members of Congress?
I feel like I`m not getting the full experience of a gas station bathroom if I don`t cut and dye my hair and change my identity.
18 is TOO young to get married! You can`t even buy booze at 18! If you can`t buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!?
My tricks aren`t for kids.
I dance like people wish they weren`t watching.
Shopping for bridesmaid dresses with 5 other women, today. If you never hear from me again, I committed suicide by nail file.
Time to get out of bed and worry from another location.
why me is me ?
Tip for women; All men really want is to be close to someone who will leave them the hell alone.
snooze button, becuase all I need after 8 hours of sleep, is a nap
My Facebook weather forecast looks like I can expect 2 or 3 inches of drama tonight followed by a lot of bullsh!t blowing in from all directions in the morning.
My memory foam has amnesia
How much tequila goes into mashed potatoes again?
The early bird gets the worm! So does the late bird. They all get worms all the time; there`s tons of those things. Relax, there will always be a lota worms......