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My bed has no frame and sits directly on the floor because under-bed monsters are just one less thing I have to worry about now.
great day! laundry done, dishes and house cleaned.... who am I kidding? been drinking since 9 am!!
Iยดm (insert your name) BITCHES!!!! Deal with that.
There`s never been a lazier group of people than the ones that settled on naming a candy bar "Whatchamacallit."
I am sick of people thinking deodorant is optional.
Well it`s about time I get in line for that Star Wars movie
Never believe a person who claims is telling the truth while holding a pack of beers in both their hands
So bored at work I can`t even think of something to goggle
Ladies, Admit it. Sometimes you look down at your own boobs and think "Wow, these are Awesome!"
I was doing laundry today and accidentally left out a very large fart. 4 people turned around. For a minute, I thought I was on "The Voice".
I like how the package for cotton swabs says don`t put them in your ears and everyone in the world is thinking: "WTF else would I do with them?!"
It`s time to take the next big step in my relationship by popping the question to my girlfriend ....will you get me a beer :) (<>..<>)
After Monday and Tuesday... even the week says WTF!
After watching the "Schticky" ad, I am convinced now there are 8 wonders of the world.
Step aside coffeeโ€ฆ this is a job for booze.