Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I watched Americas Got Talent for 15 minutes and I beg to differ.
It`s been few days since I heard from the voices in my head, I think it`s the calm before the storm. Some big sh!t is gonna go down!!
My son and his friends are great ... They always spray the house with air freshener before I get home.
I should probably be in a relationship just for the supervision.
I followed my heart...now I`m at the liqour store
I wonder how many messengers were killed before they came up with the saying.
Swans mate for life...in case you were wondering what made them so mean.
Chess says everything about men and women. The King has to take things one step at a time, while the Queen can do whatever the hell she wants.
An elderly woman at an ATM asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. Yup, she needs a walker.
Only you can prevent bathroom mirror pictures.
You`re never too old to ride in a radio flyer wagon but apparently you can be too fat.
If you wear your old prom dress to the pharmacy, they`ll fill your antidepressants faster.
If you see me out somewhere and act like you didn`t, you should know that I ignored you first.
Don`t worry, kids. Being an adult is mostly just googling how to do stuff.
I just did a weeks worth of cardio after I walked into a spider`s web.