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I know a lot of women who should substitute their lipstick with glue sticks.
I`m not a psychologist,,, but I remember when a Hot Wheels track magically cured 80% of ADHD
A walk in the woods helps me relax and release tension. The fact that I am dragging a body should be entirely irrelevant.
I’d like to see the dollar store get a liquor license.
Take mentos and freeze into ice cubes. Put the ice cubes in your friend’s drink. After five minutes their drink will randomly explode.
If a girl bangs ten dudes in a year she is a slut. If a guy done he`s gay. Definitely gay.
Women are fascinated by mythical creatures like unicorns, vampires, and men who are good listeners...
How long does it take possums to realize when one of them is actually dead?
A man typed in search box on Google : “What do women want?”. Google Replied : “We are also searching…”
Sarcasm is funnier when used on people who don`t understand it.
Did you know? If you were to watch all of the Saw films, it would take you 666 minutes?
Doing some laundry and hot single socks in my dryer are looking for a mate.
If you`re not afraid when someone is flipping through the photos on your phone then you`re probably boring.
Tried to make a stew and accidentally summoned a demon again.
If you go to dinner alone always ask for a table for two. Look sad as you eat and you will almost always get a free dessert