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Just tried to pay for my McDonalds with a hug, it didn`t work. Don`t believe the rumors.
Flat screens are nice and all, but they`ll never compare to the television/record player/ liquor cabinet combo extravaganza we had as kids.
I built that beach a sandcastle. Beaches love sandcastles.
Subway is the only place I can walk in and ask for a 12 inch Italian and not feel like a slut.
Is it wrong to drop off drunks at houses that aren`t theirs?
If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, there is no question. I would want them to be alive.
You only live once is the most reassuring thing I`ve ever heard.
I just assume I do everything wrong since I don`t have a wife to confirm it.
Firemen, Astronauts, and Doctors are the only people who actually followed through on what they wanted to be when they grew up.
Flight 370, proven harder to find then the G spot :-/
I was standing in front of the mirror earlier, admiring my six pack for hours. But it got really warm so I put it back in the fridge.
Why is it Donald Duck never wore pants but always had a towel wrapped around his waist when he got out of the shower?
Be safety conscious. 80% of people are caused by accidents.
When my pc crashes, I go to the guy with the most action figures in his cubicle for help.