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You know something bad is about to happen when someone says "Hold my beer and watch this."
Talking louder does not make you any less wrong.
Change is always hard.... Especially when a jar of it falls on your head.
CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE: Oh... I have nothing to say, I just crave the spotlight.
We should really thank our Dads for bringing us into this world since our Moms were probably tired and not in the mood.
keep scrolling… it gets better lol
We can`t all be princesses, somebody has to clap as I go by. :P
Hey, does anyone know which side you`re supposed to wear your fanny pack on? I want to really nail this job interview tomorrow.
Just washed my car with the squeegee at the gas station.
i only drink on days that end with y
If you find a four-leaf clover it means you have entirely too much time on your hands.
I would never survive a real job because I dont like being told when I can eat lunch...
I just watched my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes and thought, "Wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized I just watched my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes.
I wonder if strippers have nightmares about accidentally going to work fully clothed?
Not to brag, but, I`ve already consumed 174% of my daily fat requirement.