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What a terrible day. I`m going to drive through puddles & splash pedestrians to make myself feel better,
Roses are red, violets are blue. I lowered my standards, just for you.
thinks there are times when your the most beautiful girl in the world, and there are times when I’m sober.
Sorry I pissed you off, but I find you much more entertaining this way.
I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness, so I don’t intimidate you.
THESE NACHOS ARE THE BOMB! …..and that’s how I got my nachos taken away at the airport.
Happy Hallogivemas!!!!!! It`s the time of year when the stores sell Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas stuff all on ONE aisle!
For parents of small children, weekends are about as relaxing as showering with cats.
Why would anybody put 99 bottles of beer up on a wall in the first place?
i wish i could sleep ... but my damn A.D.D. kicks in and basically 1 sheep, 2 sheep, cow, turtle, duck, Ol McDonald had a farm, HEEEY Macerena.
Some days the only thought that stops me from being Dexter...is that I am WAY too pretty to go to prison
I AM doing something with my life. It’s called screwing around.
I don`t run away from my problems. That`s immature. I ignore them.
I am really getting tired of every time I go out people use me for my body. You know, to shade them from the sun and all.
Does this floor I’m laying on make me look unmotivated?