Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
There´s a thin line between "I should do a status update about that" and "I should talk to a therapist about that"
Tyler on Facebook says he ran 1.7 miles this morning… So based on calculations, I have 35 minutes to ransack his house tomorrow morning.
The day I can get a correct order at a fast food establishment is the day I will support an increase in minimum wage.
List of things I’ve accomplished today: 1. Accomplishments List
Women say they love nerds until you whip out your Pokemon cards.
Why is it that most nudists are people you don`t want to see naked?
Tip for women; All men really want is to be close to someone who will leave them the hell alone.
Find someone you`re good at.
The art of taking a self pic fast enough that no one sees you. The Stealthfie.
My life may be a mess but at least I didn`t make a harlem shake video.
People would believe everything I say.. if it wasn`t for everything I say.
Have you ever listened to somebody speak and wonder who ties their shoelaces for them?
It’s a status….not your diary…
My desire to be well informed is currently in deep conflict with my need to stay sane.
If zombies ever attack just go to Costco...they have concrete walls...years of foods and supplies...and best of all the zombies can`t get in without a Costco membership card.