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If you don`t know where you are going, any road will get you there.
Facebook is like Chinese food. When you think you had enough, you want more.
If it walks like a duck and it looks like a duck, the chances are she`s practising for her next selfie
Before we start this relationship, I am going to need you to explain a few pics in your Facebook albums.
The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn`t for any religious reasons. They couldn`t find three wise men and a virgin.
If you were home alone in the middle of the night, and you heard a fart, would you laugh or be scared.
times new roman walks into a bar. "sorry, we don`t serve your type."
When will math grow up and start solving its own problems
Day six of my push-up challenge. So far, I`ve eaten 107 push-up pops.
Why do we only crave what`s bad for us? Alcohol, deep fried food, sex with strangers. You never hear anyone say "I`d kill for some salad"
So far,,, I`ve spent 300% of this week exaggerating.
This coffee would work better if I could throw it at people.
Exercise by running up the street knocking on all the doors. - Jehovah`s Fitness.
You bring the friendship, I`ll bring the benefits.
The wifes exhausted as she`s had some hot steamy action lately, But at least the ironing basket is empty