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Attn Single people: If marriage was so great, there would be 6 people on the internet right now.
The only reason I liked your post was because I was trying to clean a smudge off my screen.
Are you reading this from a toilet? I’m writing this from one.
If there were "Box Tops for Education" on cases of beer, my kid`s school would be rich.
1 in 3 Americans, weighs as much as the other 2.
My right thumb is in the best shape of my life.
One day I will solve all problems with grace & maturity. Today is not that day...
Sorry I said "at least it`s healthy" when you asked me how cute your baby was.
I have removed all the unhealthy food from my house ... It was delicious.
Sometimes you have to flip out and go bat sh!t crazy to make a point.
eHarmony should be more like Amazon “customers who slept with Tina172 also slept with LuvinLife_83, TaintMisbehavin, and Cat_Lover03?.
I`m not opposed to manscaping, but I don`t see the point of cutting the grass until somebody takes interest in the property.
pens and pencils are drumsticks and desks and textbooks are drum kits. its a fact.
Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.
You had me at 0 mutual friends