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Do you ever think that if it weren`t for someone smoking Marijuana they might of killed you already. . .
Do you really know me or am I just an idea that you`ve built in your head?
I once tried sniffing coke, but the ice cubes kept getting stuck up my nose.
I keep trying to avoid trouble but I think it likes me.
If I had to choose between Star Wars and Star Trek, I`d probably choose vodka.
Let`s be honest, we all have someone on Facebook we wanna bang...with a pan.
It`s like my bank account doesn`t understand me at all.
Just got in 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick an ice cube up off the kitchen floor.
is pondering why people have a favorite color M&M when they all taste the same!
just wanted to tell the weekend that I love you and I will be back, I will not let the weekdays take me away from you.
F*ck spiders. F*ck them and the way they move their legs, f*ck their ability to multiply by the million and f*ck their eight, beady little black eyes that offer unblinking, soulless glimpses of the blackest depths of hell itself.
They`ve been farting with my facebook again. It`s like the old days when the the girl you woke up with wasn`t the one you went to bed with.
This is not the status message you are looking for .... Move along
I just threw up my weekend.
I always look out for #1 ... unless I`m walking thru my yard, then I look out for #2