Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The only problem with teaching little kids to share is that sometimes they want some of my stuff
My password is SupermanHulkThorGoku, that`s the strongest password I can think of.
Pretty cool how the internet lets you stay connected with people you haven`t seen in years and silently judge them on a daily basis.
It`s only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you realize that there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn`t hire stupid people.
I have NEVER faked a sarcasm in my life ;)
Yawning is our body`s way of saying 10% of battery remaining.
Underachieving Sunday through Wednesday, overachieving Thursday through Saturday.
Somewhere the inventor of yoga pants is near death from all the high fives and non-stop free tequila shots he gets.
Girl are you a University of Phoenix degree because I`m pursuing you online and from my couch
Somewhere in the world right now, somebody is buying a house based on its potential for great bathroom selfies.
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.
What`s this g-mail? I just got used to e-mail. And why did they skip f-mail?
Life`s short ... Drink fast
Elevator music bothers me on so many levels