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Summer is here. I`m in the process of moving all my bad habits outside.
Can`t reach it. Don`t need it.
What’s the answer to this question?
A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up alongside him and say, “It’s okay, I think we lost him.”
To be honest, I´m just fishing for compliments tonight.
I feel like doing something productive today. If I sit here long enough, maybe it will go away.
It’s always a special moment when you finally get to hear those three words you’ve been waiting for……. “Your order’s ready.”
I`m out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?
All single ladies, stop saying you should just give up and get a cat. If no man wants you, don’t force an innocent cat to live with you.
My girlfriend isn`t much of a wrestler but you should see her box!!
It`s really cold out there folks. If you`re heading to Wal-Mart, please wear two pairs of pajamas.
I`m super lazy today. Which is like normal lazy but I`m also wearing a cape.
Watching these gymnasts doing the balance beam is making me feel really bad about almost missing the couch.
If Facebook has taught us anything, it`s that a lot of people are not quite ready for a Spelling Bee.
The internet is full of cats because dog people actually go outside.