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Fun Fact: if you took the skin of an average person and laid it out flat,you would have enough for a serious criminal conviction :)
You know it`s good advice, when your still confused afterwards.
Note to self... next time my wife asks what`s on tv, don`t say dust
I will not let people drive me crazy because I know it`s in walking distance.
I really need to clean the house, but I`m thinking it`d be a lot faster to burn it down and start from scratch...
Being able to eat while watching Hannibal makes you more of a psychopath than anyone on the show.
To the woman with six screaming kids in Walmart, if you wonder how those condoms got in your cart, you’re welcome.
Yes, that`s correct. And the horse you rode in on.
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.
Walmart...because going to Target requires identity theft protection and a shower.
People are obsessed with this storm but in a couple months no one will talk about it anymore, which is why they named it after the movie Juno.
Posting inspirational quotes online is the first sign to depression.
People who think only god can judge them have obviously never hung out with my friends.
I bet the Fantastic 4 were just pretending to have a girl in the group. "Uh yeah she`s just invisible right now. She`s totally real though."
I bet guys that work at strip clubs are "hard" workers...